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What do you mean, I have to be a responsible adult?

March 19, 2012

Yesterday I decided, in celebration of getting halfway to my goal weight, to have a day off from counting Weight Watchers points and just eat what I wanted.  The theory was “let’s make a note at the end of the day to see how I did and then I’ll know if I’ve successfully retrained my eating” (or something).

In practice?  “Freedom!  Oh my GOD I’ve got a chocolate bar… yummm.  Dinnertime soon.  Let’s have CHIPS!  What, love?  You want pasta?  That may be so but you liiiike chips don’tcha?  We’re having chips.”  This plus various other things, like jelly and wasabi peas almost in the same mouthful.

Result: Me having stomach ache to the extent of to lying on the bed curled up and moaning.  Yowchie!
Do not try this at home.

Some of the things many of you have learned to do to look after yourselves are things I’ve learned to do late and badly – I won’t go into the reasons because they’re not relevant.  Not eating like an 11 year old with a credit card the moment the WW shackles are off may take some learning.  But it’s OK because I have a plan.  I’ll keep on having Sundays as my “day off” from counting points but I’ll use that day to be extra careful tuning into my hunger signals and steer well clear of any hyper-palatable foods.

Even if there was no increase in my weight following a day of face-stuffing (none noticed so far), the pain was not worth the pleasure.  And was it even pleasurable?  I felt like an addict attempting to exert control as I stood over the bin trying to throw the remains of a bar of chocolate away but keeping eating ‘one last bit’ before it went in.

Which hyper-palatable foods are most addicting for me?

  • Chocolate – I only ever eat 70% or above dark chocolate.  When counting WW points, I may have like ONE square of it and all’s good.  It has drugs in (sort of, probably) and my ex used to have a book entitled ‘Why Women need Chocolate‘.  I’m supposed to have given it up for Lent, though.  What should probably happen is that I give the *£@!ing stuff up for good.
  • Crisps – I don’t particularly enjoy them but I have a history of eating them habitually, usually when sad.  What a load of nonsense.  I think I’ll have to pretend I’m allergic to potatoes if they’re cut to a specific width.
  • Peanut butter – When it doesn’t even get a chance to go ON anything and I’m at the point of eating it straight from the jar with a spoon, I know I’ve reached binge crisis.

And one of the background problems is…(drumroll)
Forgetting to eat!  I binged on Sunday because, free of having to count and monitor things, I didn’t bother eating till about 4pm.  Thus really hungry even after healthy soup, thus snackattacks, thus pain.  Must do better.  😛

This evening I did a 20 minute dance workout and am now pleasantly warm and looking to get all serene and chilled before bedtime with some natural endorphins to help me out.

We all mess up sometimes; the trick is sorting it out 🙂

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From → Exercise, Junk

2 Comments
  1. Well done my amazing auntie!

    Love you loads xxx

  2. dinosaursinsocks permalink

    My biggest problem in controlling binges is the same, I forget to eat!

    I have found that keeping in substitutes for the things I crave tends to help (for me that’s crisps and bread, so I keep in pitta bread, which is thin so low in calories/carbs, and for the crisps I keep in baked ultra-low-fat ones, I’ve found Walkers Baked to be the lowest but still taste like actual crisps!)

    The best advice my dietician gave me was when (note, not if) you binge, don’t let it stop you. Being ‘good’ 90% of the time is still 90% better, don’t let that 10% stop you!

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